Wednesday, August 8, 2012

The Suspense is Terrible...I Hope It'll Last..

I likes to make new friends.
It's a layer, yo.

People are interesting creatures - all a slightly different hot mess of their own making, just like moi.


But I wouldn't exactly call myself "friendly". And apparently, neither would a new online friend of a friend, who recently described me as being "nice like Gene Wilder in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory..".

Say WHUT??

I needed to think on this a minute. Willy Wonka? From Wonkaland? I made a little table to compare and contrast:

(Of course I have things to do, why do you ask?)

Willie Wonka
The Onion at A Lot of Layers
Frizzy hair
Curly hair which tends toward frizziness
Crazy eyes
Crazy eye (in photos I always appear stoned)
Secretly mean to kids
Only really likes own kids
Emotionally cut off
Flips out on the boat ride
Flips out when she finds one glove
Eats a candy teacup
Drinks tea, does not eat cup. Usually
Shares life lessons
Occasionally overshares
Zillions of dollars
An active and creative imagination
Imaginary fantasies of becoming famous
Oompa Loompas
Small children
Fashionable purple suit
Fashionably challenged
Has a fizzy lifting drinks floating room
Occasionally burps
Goose that lays golden eggs
Wants to raise chickens in town

Well, what do you know...?

What happens when I find one glove laying around...


Reptiles in the Ice Cream said...

I think they meant it as a compliment. What kid at the end of the movie did want to be Charlie? And how sweet was Gene Wilder then? Charlie just had to prove he was worth it.

Tell them to man up and be worth your kindness.

Mrs. Tuna said...

You're totally there. Except for the money part. No. Really.

the best part of my day... said...

I'm still crushing on Mr. Wonka...and after all of these years.