Monday, February 6, 2012

Reverse Bucket List

Perhaps you remember that I don't have a bucket list. I don't even enjoy the concept. Or the movie (Sorry, Mom). I like the idea of doing a lot of fun things in my life, but not in relation to before I die. Life is complicated enough without having more pressure to do fun exciting daredevil shit.


Also, I don't like jumping off of things.
Or eating gross food.
Or working hard.
Or geriatric buddy movies.




I was thinking about the things that I will NEVER do. I don't dislike them, I just won't.
Not gonna.
Caaaan't make me...


1. Climbing Mt. Everest.
I have read Into Thin Air several times. I love it. The mistakes made, the struggle, the ego, the realization that we can't always out-do nature. But I am not going. No way, no how. Hard work and challenging your body against the biological makeup of your lungs is fun to read about, but not for this girl. A sherpa would be nice though, if just for groceries.






2. Sing in a Band
This is one I would like to do, but it's time to realize it is not gonna happen. In my alternate life, I learned to play the ukulele and such but now I just have to push my dreams on my kids. Sorry, kids. Now go practice. 





3. Sleeping with my College Professor
This was something I thought I would do when I was young (Animal House reference, perhaps?) but I was a child-bride, didn't go to college as a traditional student and I re-watched the movie and that guy's sweater/ass combo is a little too weird.


4. Falling from height in any manner (Skydiving, bungee, Cliff Diving, Roller Coasters)




Yes, never. I have never thought this was cool. I like heights, planes, but have NO desire to jump off. I have cliff dived and ridden a roller coaster, but I lend those to peer pressure and lack of knowledge about spinal injuries from ill-depth water landings.


5. I don't have a #5. 
See, I'm a quitter.